Archive for the ‘Current Affairs’ Category

Royal Multifaith wedding

If you’re anything like me, you’re not particularly interested in the royal wedding. Perhaps you have republican leanings, or you can’t bear the mawkishness of it all, or you disapprove of the terrible waste of money. Nevertheless, it cannot be denied that this cloud has a silver lining – it has presented the nation with a golden opportunity to have some fun. Let’s face it, an opportunity to have a prank in the glare of the world’s media doesn’t come along very often. And the nation’s satirists and lampooners have been rising to the occasion with gusto.

To begin with, we had the Royal Wedding Sick Bag, available in letterbox scarlet, royal blue and gold (limited edition). This was followed by – to graze just the very tip of the iceberg – a book of irreverent lookalike photographs by Alison Jackson called Kate and Wills up the Aisle, and a report on thespoof.com that the happy couple intend to tie the knot wearing “full nuclear radiation protection” as a gesture of solidarity with the Japanese. And it’s even rumoured that the Little Britain team is planning to stage an alternative ceremony, with Matt Lucas playing Kate Middleton.

But no spoof piqued global interest quite as much as the Jewish Chronicle’s deadpan story which ran on the festival of Purim (where Jews get drunk to commemorate the execution of a malevolent Persian minister, four hundred years before Christ). Kate and Wills, the Chronicle reported, are planning to acknowledge “the multi-cultural nature of modern British society” in their nuptials. While the ceremony will be “completely Anglican in nature,” the happy couple will smear “mehendi” paste on each other in accordance with Muslim tradition, then, following Hindu custom, offer each other a “morsel of food”. Finally, the Chronicle quipped, the prince will “smash a glass with his foot” in a nod to the Jewish tradition.

The response to this nugget of foolishness was extraordinary. News outlets all around the world took it seriously, including Israel’s leading broadsheet, Ha’aretz (who, red-faced, have since removed the report from their website). Meanwhile, the Twitterverse took the ball and ran with it. Wiccans demanded a human sacrifice in Trafalgar Square; Jedis suggested that Charles lop off Wills’ hand with a light sabre; and Pastafarians – devotees of Dawkins’s Flying Spaghetti Monster – began lobbying for a “traditional” pasta-based feast.

All great fun, of course, but for my wife and me the Jewish Chronicle touched a nerve. Read the rest of the article on the New Humanist website

A wartime picture of Bethnal Green Tube, scene of the 1943 disaster in which 173 people were killed

On March 5, 1943, The Times reported the findings of an inquiry into a “London shelter disaster” at Bethnal Green Tube. According to the report, a middle-aged woman, “burdened with a bundle and a baby”, had lost her footing on the stairs and obstructed the entrance to the landing. An “elderly man” stumbled over her; within seconds “a large number of people were . . . completely blocking the stairway”. This caused a crush in which 173 people were asphyxiated.

A yellowing clipping of the story in The Times is featured in Under Attack, a new exhibition at the London Transport Museum that explores life under bombardment. There is no other mention of the disaster, the worst civilian tragedy of the Second World War.

“Nearly 200 people suffocated needlessly, and the British Government hushed it up,” says the American writer Jessica Francis Kane, whose novel about the disaster, The Report — shortlisted for two prizes in the US — comes out in the UK later this month. “Churchill feared that the accident would be used as propaganda by the enemy, who would claim that Londoners were so scared they were crushing themselves to death in their scramble for the shelters.”

Read the rest of the article on the Times website (subject to paywall restrictions)

I was so chuffed and honoured to receive a personal email from David Cameron the other day that I decided to post it here. See below. –JWS

The PM

OFFICE OF THE PRIME MINISTER

TREASURY AND MINISTER FOR CIVIL SERVICE,

LONDON, UNITED KINGDOM.

Our ref: ATM/13470/IDR Your ref:…

IMMEDIATE PAYMENT NOTIFICATION.

I am The Rt Hon David Cameron, Prime Minister British Government. This letter is to officially inform you that (ATM Card Number 4900101775551222) has been accredited with your favor. Your Personal Identification Number is 413. The VISA Card Value is Ј3,000,000.00(Three Million Great British Pounds Sterling).

This office will send to you a Visa/ATM CARD that you will use to withdraw your funds in any ATM MACHINE CENTER or Visa card outlet in the world with a maximum of  Ј10,000 Pounds daily. Further more,You will be required to re-confirm the following information to enable;The Rt Hon William Hague Secretary of State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs. begin in processing of your VISA CARD.

(1)Full names: (2)Address:   (3)Country:    (4)Nationality:   (5)Phone #:   (6)Age:   (7)Occupation:

Forward Reply To: fco-gov@info.al

TAKE NOTICE: That you are warned to stop further communications with any other person(s) or office(s) different from the staff of the State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs to avoid hitches in receiving your payment.

Regards,

The Rt Hon David Cameron MP

Prime Minister.

If the walls outside the Nocturno café in Jerusalem could talk, they’d probably tell you what they already say. The area outside of the coffee shop is peppered with images and slogans that could only be found in Israel: a map of the country with the Palestinian areas removed; a soldier with the slogan “no legs, no problems”; a stencil of the national anthem, with the words changed (“the land of Zion and Jerusalem” has been replaced by “the land of Palestine and Jerusalem”). And, though Nocturno is a favorite hangout for art students from the Bezalel Academy, it’s hardly the only such canvas.

Read the rest of this article on the Tablet Magazine website

Ok, so will you take half a biscuit?

From spending cuts and coalition politics to the Israel-Palestine talks, it’s hard to escape from negotiations these days. But according to Stuart Diamond, the Pulitzer prize-winning journalist, university lecturer and former adviser to the UN, it’s not just the movers and shakers of this world who should be focusing on how to negotiate, it’s all of us.

“Everyone instinctively wants to get more,” he says. “It doesn’t have to be more for me and less for you. It just has to be, well, more.” Now Diamond has turned his idea into a new book which shows us how to get what we want in a bewildering array of scenarios.

For example: a couple tries to board a plane after the gate has closed. They stand at the window and catch the pilot’s eye, pulling long faces. It works; the pilot feels sorry for them, and instructs the ground crew to let them on. “Without uttering a word, they got through to the decision-maker,” Diamond explains. “They focused on their goals, not the rights and wrongs. They made human contact, and encouraged the pilot to use his authority to help them.”

When dealing with a faceless corporation, however, different techniques are needed. “One of my students was served soggy french fries at McDonald’s five minutes before closing,” he says. “When the worker refused to replace them, my student calmly pointed to the McDonald’s Freshness Guarantee. He got his new french fries.” So what’s the theory? “He used the company’s own standards against them,” he explains. “That’s a persuasive way to reach your goals.”

In a “hard bargain” situation, however, it’s best to be incremental. “A great example is the movie Five Easy Pieces,” says Diamond. “Jack Nicholson is refused a side order of toast at a diner. He orders a toasted chicken sandwich and negotiates to lose the mayo, the butter, the lettuce, then finally the chicken. He leads the waitress step-by-step to his original goal.”

These strategies have a wide range of applications, says Diamond. Take children, for instance. “The key point is to let them into the decision-making process. If they say, ‘I want a biscuit now!’ you can ask, ‘Why now? It’s so close to dinnertime, will you take half a biscuit?’”

In the adult world, much negotiation takes place via email. “Emails are tricky because they have very little tone,” says Diamond. “They’re like tofu; they take on the flavour of whatever the recipient is feeling.” The answer? To add the tone back in. “Start with something like ‘Please hear this email as friendly’,” he suggests. “It will help soften the mood.” Other tips include starting an email with a line of smalltalk (“Hope you’ve recovered from your cold”), being up-front if you’re in a bad mood, approximating the other person’s communication style, and keeping emails short.

So if I do all this, what can be achieved? “The sky’s the limit,” Diamond says. “You could make £1m.” I pause for a moment. “How about £2m?”

NB: An English translation of this piece, which appeared on an American website, is available here.

ISRAELE-DOPO-BANKSY Animali e rabbini giganti, semplici tag e ritratti di donne kamikaze: centinaia di chilometri di muro sono diventati tavole su cui disegnare sogni di pace e messaggi di guerra

di Jake Wallis Simons

Portano i pantaloni a vita bassa, da cui spunta l’elastico delle mutande. Ostentano tatuaggi, strafottenza e cappellini da baseball, mentre dipingono un murale con un rabbino alto tre metri.

Da una settimana, sotto l’incandescente sole israeliano, tastiamo il polso politico di questa regione attraverso i suoi graffiti e l’arte urbana. Da quando, cinque anni fa, Banksy dipinse la famosa barriera di separazione, sui muri del paese c’è stata un’esplosione di colore. Artisti internazionali accanto ad altri nati qui, opere sofisticate e creazioni amatoriali. Le scritte sui muri di Israele e Palestina offrono una prospettiva unica – spesso sorprendente – delle speranze e delle battaglie della popolazione locale. Il nostro viaggio inizia da Sderot, città assediata al confine con la striscia di Gaza tristemente nota per essere l’obiettivo preferito dei razzi sparati da Hamas. Qui è tutto costruito in cemento armato, pareti che diventano tavole da disegnare, dipingere e verniciare per i ragazzi con i pantaloni a vita bassa: quelli di A4I (Artists for Israel), una crew americana che usa i graffiti per rallegrare i rifugi (che in caso di allarme i cittadini di Sderot devono raggiungere in 15 secondi, al massimo). “La guerra è finita mesi fa, ma gli attacchi continuano almeno una volta alla settimana”, spiega Jacob Shrybman, portavoce di Sderot Media Centre. “E i ragazzi di A4I con il loro lavoro ci danno la forza per andare avanti, dimostrandoci che non siamo stati dimenticati”. Read the rest of this entry »

"they have always maintained that Israel has no right to exist"

Listen to the audio (5 min 54 sec)

Transcript

Just ten minutes’ walk from bustling downtown Jerusalem is the district of Meah She’arim, home to the most inaccessible ultra Orthodox Jewish community in the world. It is a labyrinth of narrow, winding alleyways, and the apartment blocks are rickety, cramped and overcrowded. This is a poor community where life is dominated by religious conservatism and a dislike for outsiders. Enter this neighbourhood improperly dressed, and you risk being pelted with rubbish or stones, or even attacked with mace gas.

In the heart of this labyrinth is a prominent building with a large black flag hanging horizontally from the roof, symbolising a state of perpetual mourning. On the walls are signs in Hebrew, English and occasionally Arabic: “Zionists are not Jews, only racists,” says one. “Arabs yes, Zionists no,” says another. “Zionism is the holocaust of the Jewish nation,” says a third, and finally: “we mourn the 62-year existence of the state of Israel.”

This is the headquarters of the Neturei Karta, or “Guardians of the City,” one of Israel’s most controversial radical sects. Their male followers look no different from other Ultra Orthodox Jews, wearing black coats and hats, and bushy beards and ringlets. They live in Jerusalem and have been there since before Israel was established, but they have always maintained that the State has no right to exist.

Inside the building, amidst the sound of chanting from a distant room, and surrounded by bookshelves that strain under the weight of leather-bound scriptures, sits Rabbi Meir Hirsh, the leader of this organisation. A diminutive man in his late forties, he conducts himself with an air of considerable gravity. “God exiled us from our land two thousand years ago because of our sins,” he tells me in a surprisingly sonorous voice, “and He forbade us to return until the Messiah comes. The Zionists have rebelled against God’s will, captured Israel and turned it into a secular state, destroying the very root of Judaism. For as long as the State of Israel exists, “ he continues, “I will be telling the world that true Jews hate Zionism and everything it stands for. This is my life’s mission, like my father before me.” Read the rest of this entry »

'those infuriating little orange diamonds'

Ok, so I know it’s the election tomorrow. The most important election for a generation and all that. But it gets right up my nose when my neighbours put political signs up in their windows.

Several of my neighbours here have done that this week. All Liberal, as it happens. You know, those infuriating little orange diamonds. But what’s so liberal about intimidating your local community for political gain? Do they really think that, as I’m about to put a tick on the ballot sheet, I’ll be hypnotised by weeks of subliminal suggestion and be magnetised towards the Lib Dem box? As it happens, I’m a swinging voter. I’m not sure which way the prevailing winds will blow when I cast my ballot tomorrow. But I think I might vote Tory, just because my neighbours don’t want me to.

And what if I was a Tory? How would I feel then? Would I dare to put a ‘vote for change’ sign up in my front window, in defiance of the burgeoning sea of Liberalism lining the houses where I live? And if I did, what then? Would I be ostracised? Would people stare through me, walk past me? Would they smash my windows in the middle of the night, or put a flaming turd through my letterbox?

I know what you’re thinking. If you were a Tory, you would deserve it. And maybe you’re right. But my point still stands: election or no election, people should keep their political opinions to themselves. This shameless bullying has to stop.

Now I’m off for a sherry and a duck shoot.

NB: As it turned out, Winchester went to the Tories — a surprise result. Obviously those Lib Dem stickers had the same effect on everyone else as they had on me! –JWS

'Bibi may have changed'

News is breaking this morning that Binyamin Netanyahu, the Israeli prime minister, has caved in to US pressure. Sources report that he has tacitly agreed a freeze on the controversial plans to build several hundred new Jewish homes in Ramat Shlomo, East Jerusalem. This shows a flicker of hope. Not only does it — tentatively — bode well for renewed peace talks with the Palestinians, it also shows that Bibi may have changed. Or at least, he has learned from past mistakes.

In 1996, when Netanyahu was last in office, Bill Clinton faced him down on a similar issue. Netanyahu, through evasive political maneuvering, sought to both placate and defy the US administration. The result was disastrous for the Israeli leader; at the first opportunity, the Israeli public voted him out of office, citing his handling of US relations as their primary motivation.

This time round, history has repeated itself — but thankfully, only up to a point. Netanyahu, in moving towards a compromise with the Americans that will enable forward movement, has shown that at last his traditional belligerence has been tempered by pragmatism.

Nothing is ever certain in the middle east. Tomorrow’s news may demonstrate that Bibi has changed his mind, and re-authorised the settlement construction in the face of US pressure. But today, at least, it seems that we’re looking at a new Bibi. And we can warm our hands around a small — and increasingly rare — flame of hope.

NB: The reports on which this blog post was based later proved premature. Netanyahu did not, in fact, cave in; he simply offered a temporary freeze on construction, which did not satisfy Washington. For Netanyahu to drop the building plans completely would have put him in extremely hot water with members of his coalition back in Israel. Subsequently, the Israeli premier stated that ‘construction in Jerusalem is like construction in Tel Aviv and we have clarified that for the American government’. So the story rumbles on. >sigh< –JWS