Archive for the ‘The Guardian’ Category

Dr James Gordon working with children in Kosovo

Perhaps it has always been this way. But it seems that we have been inundated with disasters – both man-made and natural – recently. Japan; New Zealand; Haiti. In each case, our TV screens are filled with images of rescue workers. Countless aid agencies are active, from Save the Children to the medical wing of the Israeli Army, delivering essential humanitarian aid. But what about the psychological damage?

This is where Dr James Gordon, a 69-year-old psychiatrist from Washington DC fits in. Gordon is a big man with a flashing smile and something of the evangelist about him. His medical credentials are impressive: Harvard and the National Institute of Mental Health, a former adviser to Presidents Carter and Clinton. But he is also an expert in alternative medicine. In 1991, he founded the Centre for Mind-Body Medicine, which “combines the precision of modern science with the wisdom of the world’s healing traditions”. And he has made it his mission to work in disaster zones.

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Philip Sallon and Boy George

They’ve put him in a private room. Through the window, the London Eye can be seen turning languidly in the heat. On the table there is a jar of gefilte fish and a can of pickles; on the wall is a get-well-soon card from the Pet Shop Boys. A bouquet of flowers from Vivienne Westwood (who was turned away by hospital staff, having arrived outside visiting hours) is on the windowsill. And lying in bed, pale, bruised and dishevelled – yet nevertheless looking irrepressibly pre-Raphaelite – is the iconic gay socialite Philip Sallon, his extravagant black hair forming a corona around his head.

“I still feel weird. Like it’s a dream or something,” he tells me. “When they first brought me in, I couldn’t even remember the details of my parents’ deaths. And now I’m suffering from terrible headaches. Does my memory seem all right to you?”

The night before, Sallon – a committed, if not religious, Jew – hosted a Passover “Seder night” in the ward (hence the gefilte fish, the pickles). Among the guests were Boy George and Matt Lucas’s mother. But after a while, plagued by severe headaches, Sallon retired to bed.

In Piccadilly Circus, central London, in the early hours of April 3, Sallon was seriously assaulted. Having suffered a haemorrhage on the brain, he was given a 50/50 chance of survival. Now, with the aid of round-the-clock medical care, he has stabilised. The reason for the attack remains unknown; his memory of it is blank.

The police investigation is moving slowly. Detectives have released a description of the suspect: an athletic, six-foot male of around 20; short black hair; a tight, royal blue T-shirt; jeans; black trainers. “Several people came to Philip’s aid after the attack,” says Mick Forteath, the detective leading the investigation. “But so far they haven’t come forward. We’re appealing to anyone who saw the assault itself, the prelude, or the aftermath, to come and talk to us.”

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Ok, so will you take half a biscuit?

From spending cuts and coalition politics to the Israel-Palestine talks, it’s hard to escape from negotiations these days. But according to Stuart Diamond, the Pulitzer prize-winning journalist, university lecturer and former adviser to the UN, it’s not just the movers and shakers of this world who should be focusing on how to negotiate, it’s all of us.

“Everyone instinctively wants to get more,” he says. “It doesn’t have to be more for me and less for you. It just has to be, well, more.” Now Diamond has turned his idea into a new book which shows us how to get what we want in a bewildering array of scenarios.

For example: a couple tries to board a plane after the gate has closed. They stand at the window and catch the pilot’s eye, pulling long faces. It works; the pilot feels sorry for them, and instructs the ground crew to let them on. “Without uttering a word, they got through to the decision-maker,” Diamond explains. “They focused on their goals, not the rights and wrongs. They made human contact, and encouraged the pilot to use his authority to help them.”

When dealing with a faceless corporation, however, different techniques are needed. “One of my students was served soggy french fries at McDonald’s five minutes before closing,” he says. “When the worker refused to replace them, my student calmly pointed to the McDonald’s Freshness Guarantee. He got his new french fries.” So what’s the theory? “He used the company’s own standards against them,” he explains. “That’s a persuasive way to reach your goals.”

In a “hard bargain” situation, however, it’s best to be incremental. “A great example is the movie Five Easy Pieces,” says Diamond. “Jack Nicholson is refused a side order of toast at a diner. He orders a toasted chicken sandwich and negotiates to lose the mayo, the butter, the lettuce, then finally the chicken. He leads the waitress step-by-step to his original goal.”

These strategies have a wide range of applications, says Diamond. Take children, for instance. “The key point is to let them into the decision-making process. If they say, ‘I want a biscuit now!’ you can ask, ‘Why now? It’s so close to dinnertime, will you take half a biscuit?’”

In the adult world, much negotiation takes place via email. “Emails are tricky because they have very little tone,” says Diamond. “They’re like tofu; they take on the flavour of whatever the recipient is feeling.” The answer? To add the tone back in. “Start with something like ‘Please hear this email as friendly’,” he suggests. “It will help soften the mood.” Other tips include starting an email with a line of smalltalk (“Hope you’ve recovered from your cold”), being up-front if you’re in a bad mood, approximating the other person’s communication style, and keeping emails short.

So if I do all this, what can be achieved? “The sky’s the limit,” Diamond says. “You could make £1m.” I pause for a moment. “How about £2m?”

20% of the UK population will suffer from depression – double 30 years ago

Dr Steve Ilardi is slim and enthusiastic, with intense eyes. The clinical psychologist is 4,400 miles away, in Kansas, and we are chatting about his new book via Skype, the online videophone service. “I’ve spent a lot of time pondering Skype,” he says. “On the one hand it provides a degree of social connectedness. On the other, you’re still essentially by yourself.” But, he concludes, “a large part of the human cortex is devoted to the processing of visual information, so I guess Skype is less alienating than voice calls.”

Social connectedness is important to Ilardi. In The Depression Cure, he argues that the brain mistakenly interprets the pain of depression as an infection. Thinking that isolation is needed, it sends messages to the sufferer to “crawl into a hole and wait for it all to go away”. This can be disastrous because what depressed people really need is the opposite: more human contact.

Which is why social connectedness forms one-sixth of his “lifestyle based” cure for depression. The other five elements are meaningful activity (to prevent “ruminating” on negative thoughts); regular exercise; a diet rich in omega-3 fatty acids; daily exposure to sunlight; and good quality, restorative sleep. Read the rest of this entry »

'As a parent it is my duty to acknowledge that the strands that weave the tapestry of our identities are not singular, but multiple'

The prospect of Britain and Israel going to war is an unlikely one. At the orthodox Jewish school that I attended, however, it must have seemed like a distinct possibility. We used to regularly debate which side we would fight for. Although steeped in religious observance, we had been born in England, grew up here, and developed strong allegiances to English football teams. We spoke little modern Hebrew and had been to Israel just a handful of times. Nevertheless, the feeling was unanimous: we would take up arms on behalf of the Jewish state.

From one point of view, we were simply using a primitive thought experiment to mould our nascent sense of identity. At the same time, however, this was more than just an abstract exercise. Many of my schoolmates volunteered for the Israel Defence Forces (IDF) after completing their A-levels and my younger brother, Zack, was among them. Read the rest of this entry »

'The masterful literary photographer'

“I’m crazy about Chekhov”, Woody Allen once remarked. “I never knew anyone that wasn’t.” Today, on Chekhov’s 150th birthday, that statement rings truer than ever. Much has been written about the enduringly modern quality of Chekhov’s work, and with good reason. He is one of the most frequently cited influences of contemporary writers, and it is possible to argue that echoes of his brevity, impressionism, and disregard for traditional plot resonate through the majority of modern literary fiction and drama.

Chekhov’s genius is not limited to his plays and stories. He was a prolific letter-writer, and his correspondence offers a tantalising glimpse into his revolutionary approach to aesthetics. He often offered pieces of advice to other writers, and several have since hardened into accepted principles of writing. The most famous of these is commonly known as Chekhov’s Gun, which he defined in a letter to Lazarev-Gruzinsky, his one-time co-writer, in November 1889: “one should not put a loaded rifle onto the stage if no one is thinking of firing it,” he wrote. “If in the first act you have hung a pistol on the wall, then in the following one, it should be fired. Otherwise don’t put it there.” The essence of the metaphor is clear: economy is everything. Read the rest of this entry »